I just have to share. I love Brom's update letters.
Warning from BROMART!
Brom has escaped and is on the prowl! We’ve found his personal journal, deciphered his illegible hand-writing and have pin-pointed that he will be at the following locations at the following times and dates:
New York Comic Con February 24th (afternoon) and 25th (morning) - signing at the Harry Abrams booth
Signing at St Marks Comics February 25th, Saturday, 8 - 10PM,
11 St Marks Place, NYC, NY
(212) 598-9439
Emerald City Comic Con April 1st and 2nd 2006. Seattle
World Horror Con San Francisco May 11 - 14th
San Diego Comic Con July 20 -23 2006
Our understanding is he will be there to promote his new book the Plucker, as well as to chat, tell lies, use profanity poorly, and sign just about anything you bring to him that he can’t eat.
If you spot him, remain calm, approach with caution. Keep out of spitting and biting distance. His shots are not up to date. Do not offer him food scraps. And at all cost keep small children, the elderly, and members of the clergy at least 50 feet away.
Miscellaneous Jargon
Please do not respond to this note, as I will never receive it. All replies to this mailing list go directly to Hell and will be read by pointy eared devils that delight in making fun of your bad grammar. Instead just send a note to blackmail@bromart.com .
If by chance someone put you on my mailing list as a cruel joke, or if you have been instructed by a piece of bread bearing the semblance of the Christ to stay away from me, just go to http://www.bromart.com and hit Unsubscribe. We will remove you from the list immediately … well maybe not immediately, depends what’s on TV that night. How about some time relatively soon thereafter, with the condition nothing really good is airing that night?
3 comments:
'use profanity poorly' huh... that put the squeeze on my brain 'til I realised that some people actually do cuss skillfully!
;)
The damn fine art of profanity...
I know what you mean! Some folks can do it so damn well, it makes you wonder if they took classes - and where the hell you can take some. LOL
Then again, accents can make profanity sound interesting too. Like Pierce Brosnan in that Simpson Treehouse of Horror. Something about a guy, with a proper British accent saying, "Damn straight." ;-D
Cussing with class lol!
There's an extra thrill/shock factor when it's coming from a really gentile seeming person.
People always look surprised when I emphasize something with a cuss word, for instance... I guess most people see me as really gentle, or level, or quiet or something, it's unexpected. Then they look at me in a new way.
It's cool, I don't like to be boxed in by people's perceptions of me, so it's good to kick that in the ass once in a while!
:)
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