Offerings

I think I will come back to water after I'm finished with the paintings for the Tomato Art Fest.  For some reason, it's hard to write about water - I didn't realize I was so rusty on it!

Another question came up while I had the podcasts going as I painted.  I think it was an older New World Witchery podcast and they were talking about offerings - especially food offerings.  How to deal with them?  Do you leave them for awhile and eat them yourself at a later time?  Do you throw it out when they're 'done'?  (Wait...was it The Jaguar and The Owl podcast?  One of those two.)

I still have conflicted feelings about it, even after all this time.  On the one hand, it feels rude to put out food, only to come back later and take it away to eat it myself.  One of the guests made the observation: "You don't invite family over and let them fill their plates, only to have it taken away and eaten by someone else."

However, it feels quite companionable sometimes to have something like a burger or a snack to share with Them.  It's a little like sharing the popcorn at a movie.  I also like to sit down and offer a cup of tea.  It doesn't seem so...wasteful that way.

That is the crux of the thing, right there.  I am the granddaughter of people who lived through the Depression.  My paternal grandparents never talked about it but there was always plenty of food stored away in the root cellar - all things canned by grandmother out of the garden.  My maternal grandmother rarely talked about the Depression but she had a lingering distaste for macaroni and tomatoes because many times, that was all there was to eat.  (It was just cooked macaroni with canned tomatoes added to it, juice and all.)

So it is almost an ingrained thing for me.  You just do not waste food, no matter what.

I came across a blog (was it Devo's?) that explained the shrine they had set up.  What surprised me was the use of re-ment - in this case, good quality 1/12 scale food, plates and even beer.  They talked about how they had enough to switch out 'meals' fairly often.  The author of The Twisted Rope blog points out that is is not only the food (or spirit of food) that feeds the gods, but also the ritual, the words we say - the entire act of spending time with the gods that nourished Them.  Granted, re-ment may not work in every situation but it still seems like a viable option in a shrine.  It definitely looks like an easier option than paper things that is so popular in some Asian ceremonies, where they are burned to send the spirit of the things to the spirits. 

Moving around the septagram - The Sun

Since I skipped last night from being absolutely brain fried, I suppose I should jump straight into it.  I've tried writing about the septagram before but I don't think I've actually written about why it resonates with me so much. 

I came across this particular set of what the points mean years ago, I don't even remember where.  I don't even remember there being any explanations, other than the labels on the points.  The definitions have come along over the years, but I'm not sure anyone could ever be finished plumbing the meanings of each point. 

It's said that the septagram first appeared in Hellenic Greece, when a seven day week was adopted.  Since then, it has appeared in quite a few places - alchemy, various forms of witchcraft and Wicca, math...

For me, the seven points represent, in a clockwise direction from the upper right: 1.) the Sun, 2.) The Land, 3.) the Waters, 4.) the Magics, 5.) the Winds, 6.) the Moon and 7.) the Connection that binds all the other points together. 

The Sun: It is our closest star, at 93 million miles away from the Earth.  It can also be said to be the creator of our solar system, when something billions of years ago set off a chain reaction that began with a nebulous cloud of dust compressing and catching fire.  That single little proto-star set into motion the dust around it, where it whirled and whirled; crashed and crumbled, until the planets formed and settled into their orbits.

(I'll take that creation story any day, although Dave Sobel can tell it much more poetically than I in The Planets.)

Of course, in Egyptian mythology, the sun can be Ra, or Aten, Horus or Set (there He is again!)  Ra or Aten is the sun; Horus is the rising sun while Set is sometimes the setting sun although Horus' epithet of 'God of the Two Horizons' (under his guise as Horakhty) makes Him the god of the setting sun as well.

Paula Gunn Allen calls our sun Sutalidihi, Sixkiller.  Not only is She the lifegiver of the planet, but she is also a deadly thing, as deadly as an atomic bomb.  There is also a Cherokee story about how the Sun was once too close to the Earth, making all its inhabitants suffer.  The sorcerers tried to move it and it took four tries to get it far enough away. 

We can all see this dangerous side of the Sun when we're not careful.  Things left too long on the clothesline fade.  Too much exposure burns us, which can lead to other, nastier things. 

However, without the Sun, there wouldn't be any life.  The action of the Sun's warmth at the equator causes the atmosphere to expand and move and circulate around the planet.  It also feeds plants and trees, when they convert the sunlight to sugar via photosynthesis. 

The Sun has its obvious associations with fire - after all, it is a big, roiling ball of nuclear energy.   It is the symbol of all that is known, or out in the open, hence the saying, "Bringing it out into the light of day."  It can power spells and cleanse magical objects and stones.  It is symbolic of action, of power, of passion.  Yellows, reds and white are its colors.  It is a very powerful energy - so powerful, I've had people tell me that if you draw it down and channel its energy, it will poison you.  (I haven't had any bad experiences with it though.)

A post about painting and Egyptian Gods in which Star Wars references were NOT made...

I was seriously considering blowing off tonight's entry.  Sleep will not be long in coming tonight, I hope.  I worked about six hours on a painting today and when I say six hours, I mean "turned on the podcasts and off I went without a break."  I listened to some old Snap Judgement Spook episodes and Dreamland, plus one interview with Brian Cox that I completely forgot I had. 

The painting ended up being redone from yesterday, but I was prepared for that.  I'm not entirely in the love with the background - mostly the purple left from the previous composition. 

I hope the painting will be fine.  After I finished for today, I hung it on the porch in the usual place by the door for the night.  A storm blew up and it was a strong one.  The wind blew the rain in horizontally...all the way to the front door and the painting.  Hopefully, it will dry without any spotting. 

All this work today...I suppose some people will be disappointed to find out it is the third composition for that board.  I finally just painted over the ferris wheel.  It just wasn't working and it was a chore to work on - hell, to look at again.  I had forgotten my rule of thumb: if it doesn't make me smile or chuckle, then it needs to be gone.  It's a lesson I've been relearning on several fronts lately. 

Perhaps that is why Set is back, perhaps He was never gone and I was just not in shape to perceive Him (hell, I could barely perceive the mundane there for a while.)

ANYWAY...

He's been on my mind a lot lately.  A friend posted in her blog night before last about the Furies and mentioned how they have been maligned in modern times and how they were originally storm gods.

The same could be for Set.  I'm not saying He has a completely undeserved reputation and He is all puppies and ice cream (heh.)  It simply isn't the whole picture. 

He is one of the oldest gods in the Egyptian pantheon.  Of course, one the best known stories about Set is the one involving Osiris.  You know: family squabble, Osiris gets murdered (there are two different stories about how it came about) and it's all because of jealousy.

But was it?  Really?

The thing about mythology is it sometimes get influenced by whoever is in charge.  In the older stories, Set is simply the opposite of Horus.  He was Night to Horus' Day and they were equals - more like yin and yang.  Some say this is because the lands were in peace, Set's North and Horus' South.  Somewhere along the line, the South may have gained more power, hence Set being maligned. 

What does this have to do with Osiris?  If you look at the stories, in the beginning, Osiris was a vegetation god.  That's it.  But once Set got a hold of Him, Osiris descended to the underworld...and became Lord of it and of resurrection.  In other words, He went from being a vegetation god to being a Big Deal.  Without Set's actions, He may have never risen (pun intended) within the pantheon.  I suppose it could even be seen as an initiation. 

I could make a comparison to Darth Vader and Obi Wan but I'll refrain.

Coming back to today's painting, destruction was certainly the name of the game.  Hopefully, this comp is infinitely better than the other one with the ferris wheel.  I had wanted to do something different but I don't know.  It just wasn't working.  Perhaps the idea just needed time to go to ground and come back bigger and better.   

Sovereignty vs. freedom

Happy Independence Day!

Sumner County is appropriately spook free tonight, as per Chinese custom.  Unfortunately, about the time I decided everyone was done for the night and got the food put out for the cats, the neighbors on the other side of the cemetery began shooting the loudest fireworks yet.  They put on a good, brave front but even Arlo gave up after eating a good deal of his food.  Black cat was the first to head back to the house, followed by Kuma.  Like I said, Arlo was last.  It was as if he was saying, "I don't care.  I got my food." 

I ended up bringing the most of the food to the porch.  Black Cat was happier with that idea. 

I was going to use question #2 in chapter one of The Circle Within but I think I will use the day to write about sovereignty. 

sovereignty: * supreme power or authority,
                          * The authority of a state to govern itself or another state
                           synonyms: autonomy, independence, freedom, self rule
                      
                          * A self governing state

freedom: The power or right to act, speak or think as one wants without hindrance or restraint

independence: Not influenced or controlled by other in matters of opinion, conduct, etc.; thinking or acting for oneself      

Many times, it seems that sovereignty and freedom are used interchangeably and in some situations, I don't believe there is a problem in that.  Is there a difference when it comes to our path and religion?

Freedom is something we have from the beginning - we have the freedom to choose.  Do we stay with our birth religion; seek out another path or do away with spirituality altogether?  We are also free to do as we please once that decision is made, whether it is to show up for appearances, or to dive into the lessons the path has to offer. 

Sovereignty, on the other hand, is earned.  We have very little sovereignty when we begin.  Some people are happy not gaining much more sovereignty and simply going along with the masses.  Others have a need - a drive - to go deeper, to make the connections and create a wide ranging base of knowledge to stand on as a foundation.  With this foundation, they can build on their ability to decide for themselves what is right - their ability to govern themselves instead of going with the masses. 

It seems to me that sovereignty is the harder road, involving a great deal of hard work and not much room for slacking off.  In the end, however, it seems to also be the much more satisfying way to go.  

Panthers and mysteries

Once, a long time ago, Gods roamed the land.  They claimed the sky worlds and they stalked the Underworld.  The Sun, Moon, Morning Star and the Thunderers kept the stability and order while the creative, fertile, yet chaotic forces charged up from the Underworld from the Corn Mother and beings like the underwater panther.  We humans lived in a liminal place - the Middle world, full of beings in its own right: Hawk, the Horned Serpent, and the spirits of plants, trees, and rocks.

Of course, as a Pagan, I know this is still true.  Gods and spirits abound.   

I had a dream not long after I moved into this house.  I was walking on a high bank along a shallow creek on a bright sunny day.  I was fascinated by the water - it was so clear, I had no trouble seeing each and every rock on the bottom as if I held them in my hands.  Suddenly, I saw something moving beneath the water, a mountain lion.  I was seeing the top of its head and back, even though the water was only a few inches deep.   It stalked along the creek bottom until suddenly it launched itself straight up and right at me.  Its claws and teeth missed me by mere inches as I jerked backwards in surprise and it fell back into the creek bed.  This was no flesh and blood feline.  It was composed entirely of water.

The underwater panther is a figure from a group of peoples archeologists once called the South Eastern Ceremonial Complex.  They were also moundbuilders.  In some surviving stories from later peoples, it is said that a meeting with such a being will either heal you or kill you.  I'm not sure what that says about mine.  I only know that I had never heard about any such things before the dream.  The dream was so vivid and I could hear the sound of the water as it rippled through the bed as well the crash it made as when the cat fell back into the creek.  Was it just a dream?  I'm not so sure.  It is something I still ponder to this day. 

I had intended to write about some of the deities I work with today but sometimes, the muse has other ideas.  I asked myself if this fulfills the prompt for this week: "an opportunity for you to share with everyone those who guide, inspire and inform you."  I'm not entirely sure it does, not in the strict deity/divine way.  Still, sometimes it's the mystery of a thing that is the inspiration.  No one ever started out on a quest because they had all the answers.    

Things I do

I don't know why I am drawn to do this entry.  Check that, I guess I do.  I started blogging all those years ago because I needed an outlet that allowed me to open up and speak my mind.  It was a way to build confidence.  I find myself needing it again.  Despite appearances on Facebook, I feel I have been saying less and less.  At least, I feel I have been speaking with less...substance.  It's time to change that.  What better way to begin than to write about my Pagan experiences? 

In many ways, it seems to be too personal, too private to speak of my spirituality or my practice.  Plus, right now I don't have any one daily practice, although I do catch myself looking at a certain plaque I sculpted and just talking to the one it represents.  More often or not, I talk to Him almost as if He were a hennish best friend (as embarrassing as it is to admit that,) but it suits Him.  I do talk to Him more seriously at times but I can't stay serious for long.

I used to have a more witchy practice - the candles, the incense, the circles and spells.  I still enjoy many of those things.  I love how centering it is to sit and recite a rosary to the Star Goddess or to gaze into a candle's flame.  I still sometimes draw sigils and give offerings, whether it is in return for something done or just because I want to do so.  Lately, however, I have been going a more shamanic route. 

I took some classes in Core Shamanism many years ago from a student of Michael Harner but they fell apart when we couldn't keep a decent number of people in our drumming circle.  While I later read books like Harner's and Caitlin Matthews' Singing the Soul Back Home, the lessons I learned then didn't stick until all these years later.   

I won't do it every day but I try to journey at least once a week.  I love the feeling I get from riding the drumbeat through the worlds.  I love the exploration and the feeling of cooperation and connectedness I feel throughout (well, with the exception of that one flower.  It let me know in no uncertain terms what it thought of humans but I have to admit I liked its grumpy, cantankerous self.)   I also try to leave room afterward to let my experiences percolate through my brain.  I feel that to do it more often, especially without reflection and that percolation, is to risk becoming something of an Otherworlds Tourist, tripping through Worlds and not getting anything much of worth out of the experience.  I will not do that to my Gods and my allies.      

I have heard people ask and I have asked the question myself, "Are the things that happen during journeys real?"  My teacher's answer was that if you get something good out of it, does it matter if it's real or not?  I have to admit, it is a good answer.  Then again, there are the times I got some bit of information on a journey and it turned out to be right on target.  I also remember picking Michael Harner's book Cave and Cosmos and as I flipped through it, seeing a hand drawn map showing a place I had visited in my journeys and never mentioned to anyone.  There were other accounts of people having very similar experiences to mine.   

I think I have my answer on that score.  Something is certainly going on the 'is it real' front.   

30 Days (or so) meme: Why I am Pagan

Well, I figured it's high time I joined in the 30 Days meme.  That's me - join in after everyone else had done it and moved on.   Plus, it's hard for me to talk about my beliefs.  Faith is such a personal, private thing. 

So...I've got the headphones on and Voltaire's singing Oh Lord.  Let's rock this thing, shall we?      

Day 1 - Why Paganism?

Short answer?  It's one of the few faiths I explored that allowed me to be myself.  It also allows for the mystery of the world to be real, without excusing it as simply being an illusion. 

When I was a kid, we went a nearby Cumberland Presbyterian church.  Except for my grandmother, we weren't a very religious bunch.  Church was just Something You Did.  I remember Sunday School could be interesting - the older kids would start talking to the teacher about the latest horror movies they've seen or something they did during the week.  Surely, we worked through the lessons but I don't remember them.
               
I do remember some of the mystery of the church.  I remember at Easter when the "juice and crackers" were passed around.  The preacher would talk about how they were the body and blood of Jesus but whenever I saw them, they'd change back into crackers and grape juice.  I also remember constantly looking up at the sky because I had been told "God is watching you!"  It was like always being under the gaze of a third parent was way more stern than my mom or dad.  He'd send me away forever just because he didn't like something I did.
   
When I hear about seeing the world as a child would, this is what I think about.  Never did catch a glimpse of that guy that was always watching, either.

I started questioning things when I was about twelve.  My parents had divorced two years before and my dad was going to a Southern Baptist church.  I did. Not.  Like. It.  AT ALL.  There was no mystery.  No wonder.  Just a bunch of people who came to See and Be Seen.  Oh yeah, there was some guy standing up front talking about how we were all wrong too. 

This was also about the time I began walking the woods behind our house after school.  I couldn't wait to get home every day because I had a good three hours before my got home from work and I could go looking for a mystery.  I would have at least one cat journeying with me, usually more.  The trees were my friends.  I once followed the path of a turkey vulture flying overhead and found a spot I had never visited that was very sacred and magical.  The pawpaw tree growing through a pile of rocks was a faery mound.  Where did the water in the spring come from and were there caves in the bluffs at the top of the hill?  Where would they go if I found them?  What lived in the woods besides the cows and deer?  (I longed to catch a glimpse of Bigfoot but hoped I wouldn't too.)  The world was alive and full of joy.        

This is why I'm Pagan.  Now, not only the world but the universe is alive and full of joy.  The sky is full of bright, distant stars but it is part of the body of Her as well.  The sun is not simply a flaming ball of gas but it is also Ra on His Barque, protected by Set and Khnum as it travels through the Underworld at the end of the day.  At the same time, I sit vigil every Yule so the Sun will rise. 

Someone has to.  If the world forgets its stories, it forgets its reasons for being alive.  Life just becomes drudgery, a ceaseless routine of colorless chores.  I don't want that to happen on my watch, mister.                    

Safari time

"That I speak here of art as a Way, gives away that I see the way of the artist as a kind of pilgrimage. When you go on a pilgrimage, you set out from where you happen to be and start walking toward a place of great sanctity in the hope of returning from it renewed, enriched and sanctified.

However far you may walk, every pilgrimage is a safari into your own dark interior, an inner journey."

- Frederick Franck,
Art as a Way, p. 21
1981


There are certain courses I sometimes wish I never taken in college. Philosophy was one and oddly, World Civ. Don't get me wrong. They were excellent classes with excellent instructors. No, these classes challenged everything I believed to the point of severe doubt.

A lot of philosophers seem to think the only way to go is through our own minds and reason. We learned early on in World Civ how man first saw god as the raw elements: wind, storms, lightening, etc. Later, as man became hunters, the gods were seen in the animals. Once man began living in settlements, god was in man's own image. It made me wonder if the whole thing wasn't just all in our heads.

Once my beliefs were gone, I felt empty. Worse, suddenly the entire universe did as well. For example, trees weren't these wonderful, vibrant beings anymore. They were...well, just plants that provided shade and wood. It was a miserable place.

I had an interesting day today. It was supposed to be a clear, sunny day with no chance of rain. I got everything set just right and sat down to work on the composition for a possible painting when I heard the thunder. Rain was a comin'. I was half joking when I said, "Ooo...looks like Set's not happy with me for posting those sketches. Am I going to have to make an apology? How about some rum? Would that do it?"

The strange thing is the wind picked up, the clouds moved off to the north (Set is said to live in the Northern sky, in one of the stars that form Ursa Major - the Great Bear) and there was sunshine again. I got the rum, took a sip and it burned all the way down to my belly. Set got about three fingers' worth. The Doors were in the CD player so Jim Morrison got a hit of rum too.

The sun stayed out until I started packing up around five thirty or so.

So, was it all a coincidence? You know, I've decided I really don't care. This is my safari and I choose to live in a wonderfully, vibrantly responsive universe where there are gods who are mollified with rum, trees have as much - if not more - personality than a lot of people I know and there are things undreamt that I haven't discovered yet.

I aim to play. I may even misbehave. Ah hell, who am I kidding? Me and misbehavin' go together like chocolate and peanut butter.